Rainy Day
What a nice rainy day. So I passed, passed my test! What a moment of relief. Now my girlfriend kept my truck last night, drove it another 50 miles and was taking it in for me in the morning...she gets there, and the guy tells her to drive about 40 more miles..to the airport and back. Without shutting off the car, it will pass. Poor thing, in the rain, had to drive more highway miles and then I passed. God, how I love her, she is too good to me..totally has my back..who needs a man when you have everything you need from everyone around you, which is respect, patience, value..honesty, loyalty..and you know..that building attitude..the strength to always build your relationships to that solid point..the point of no return..where, yup--you know the deal, no backstabbing..no doubts..just a big fucking period with no question mark, the relationships I'm used to...today there is too much phoney bologna crap..from both men and women...which is why I don't entertain girls..don't need anymore girlfriends..none of these flaky chicks walking around out there with their heads totally unscrewed..I am too strong for that..I've met so many women...not that I go that route..because I DON'T, not that there's anything wrong with it...but nope, love men only. But I always have women drawn to me for some strange reason...more than men...go figure..women tend to need validation by me for some reason..the women at work, my sisters in laws..6 of them...women associated with my work..lots of them..need that good morning from me..all of them...NOTHING....NADA..I don't give it..don't know why...but I just don't..and I do get a kick out of it...When I give, I give completely..its all or nothing...I keep those close..real close..everyone else..my attitude is "take a hike..just go away"....I have no patience for flakes...so I call the dealership..told him I passed..and this frigin guy tells me, "you know..I still have your number"...now, wtf? I totally abuse you...tell you off...and now you want to call me? What is wrong with these men... The more you abuse a man, the more he loves you...we all know the deal...only works for the man sucker or the loser chick that gets no men...I am such a freakin weird breed...its not even funny.
In order for me to be with someone, I need to respect him, respect is important. I need to be good to him.....I won't be abusive..not into the whole game thing...and for a man to win me over..which to date..only has happened one and a half times...he has to be like butter with me..sweet as apple pie...humble, kind, soft, gentle and understanding...anything less...I will have to tell him where he can go..and it won't be pleasant. Being with a very hard man for so many years, you learn that the hardest man will break down for you, will crumble for you, will treat you like gold, value you and worship you...so how..just how can a woman like me settle for less. That would be for those weird chicks..those stupid ones that stay with the guy who is mentally abusive because...hmmm, they can't get anyone else and fall for the guys bs...where he is stupid too, because he knows the more he abuses her...the more she will stay..seeking validation...seeking acceptance...I say..BULLSHIT...(belch)....that would be the weak woman...See with me, I learned too much from the ex...he sold out the whole gender, shared secrets that umm, a female like me should not know...it makes me sit back and watch moves..not good.
Let's take H for eaxample, who called me last night..and put me under his sexy voice spell...yes master...H is kind, sweet, was..and I stress was...sweet and sincere..excellent with the phone..very catering to me...this is what I need...the clothes came right off..he made me melt...it was his sweetness, his attentiveness..then he changes...starts being mean and what do I do...I bolt...now yea, became in touch with him again....because I do care for him..but lets just say...he continues to be mean and doesn't kiss my boo boo in my heart...then I must go..I wouldn't take his bullshit slash drama..as I know there are easily 10 men I know I can have waiting to just want to be nice to me...now as I'm not one for dating....and yea..a one man woman..i'd like to see if he's still capable of being nice and sweet..making me take all of my clothes off for him..being under his spell...if not...then I must move on...the ex was too nice..too sweet..too catering...which makes it hard to accept less...he always made me look in other people's cars...always said there is a difference between the girl in the mercedes passenger seat and the girl who is in te seat of another car...any other car. He said...you have to be the best...have the strength, the confidence..the attitude....then he would point out the other girls...the average type chick..into the abuse..weak..not well put together..the dime a dozen chick. So after learning all of this from young..it still sticks in the back of my mind....everything...so I guess the woman he made me...knows too much to be fooled, too much to be taken..too much to settle for any less of a man...so this is what I'm thinking about on my rainy day off..man drama...being patient with my H..waiting patiently for the sugar to melt me...or wondering if this was as good as it gets..time will tell me and I trust time....I will continue in my honest ways..saying and showing what's inside...not into playing..not into playing with people..not into ever hurting H...not into it at all..just a staight shooter...very expressive shooter..who needs a man to make her melt.....melt right into him....
In order for me to be with someone, I need to respect him, respect is important. I need to be good to him.....I won't be abusive..not into the whole game thing...and for a man to win me over..which to date..only has happened one and a half times...he has to be like butter with me..sweet as apple pie...humble, kind, soft, gentle and understanding...anything less...I will have to tell him where he can go..and it won't be pleasant. Being with a very hard man for so many years, you learn that the hardest man will break down for you, will crumble for you, will treat you like gold, value you and worship you...so how..just how can a woman like me settle for less. That would be for those weird chicks..those stupid ones that stay with the guy who is mentally abusive because...hmmm, they can't get anyone else and fall for the guys bs...where he is stupid too, because he knows the more he abuses her...the more she will stay..seeking validation...seeking acceptance...I say..BULLSHIT...(belch)....that would be the weak woman...See with me, I learned too much from the ex...he sold out the whole gender, shared secrets that umm, a female like me should not know...it makes me sit back and watch moves..not good.
Let's take H for eaxample, who called me last night..and put me under his sexy voice spell...yes master...H is kind, sweet, was..and I stress was...sweet and sincere..excellent with the phone..very catering to me...this is what I need...the clothes came right off..he made me melt...it was his sweetness, his attentiveness..then he changes...starts being mean and what do I do...I bolt...now yea, became in touch with him again....because I do care for him..but lets just say...he continues to be mean and doesn't kiss my boo boo in my heart...then I must go..I wouldn't take his bullshit slash drama..as I know there are easily 10 men I know I can have waiting to just want to be nice to me...now as I'm not one for dating....and yea..a one man woman..i'd like to see if he's still capable of being nice and sweet..making me take all of my clothes off for him..being under his spell...if not...then I must move on...the ex was too nice..too sweet..too catering...which makes it hard to accept less...he always made me look in other people's cars...always said there is a difference between the girl in the mercedes passenger seat and the girl who is in te seat of another car...any other car. He said...you have to be the best...have the strength, the confidence..the attitude....then he would point out the other girls...the average type chick..into the abuse..weak..not well put together..the dime a dozen chick. So after learning all of this from young..it still sticks in the back of my mind....everything...so I guess the woman he made me...knows too much to be fooled, too much to be taken..too much to settle for any less of a man...so this is what I'm thinking about on my rainy day off..man drama...being patient with my H..waiting patiently for the sugar to melt me...or wondering if this was as good as it gets..time will tell me and I trust time....I will continue in my honest ways..saying and showing what's inside...not into playing..not into playing with people..not into ever hurting H...not into it at all..just a staight shooter...very expressive shooter..who needs a man to make her melt.....melt right into him....
posted by vita86lover at 11:34 AM
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