You Can't Make Him A Man
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
It's humanly impossible to take a coward and turn him into a man over night. A man can never ever change unless deep down in his soul, he wants to change. It doesn't matter how beautiful you are, how good natured you are, how much of a sweetheart you are. He can only change his distorted ways through re-examination of his thoughts, his mantra's, his ways of thinking about life. And lets face it, we all have opinions of how to be in relationships, certain codes that we live by, certain ideals, but do they really work? He has to re-examine the thought process. He has to come to terms with the FACT that his views/motto's about girls or relationships JUST DOES NOT WORK. How do i know this? Ask him how long his most serious and intimate relationship was. If you get a poop answer, then voila...he's without a clue. Let's just say he was with a woman for many many years. Then this a stable man. He knows how to love, how to be loved, how to interact with families, cousins, how to make plans that are outside of a bedroom and may include others as well, he knows how to communicate! After 7 or 8 years, this man makes it solid, there's a bond created that keeps the 2 of you coming back for more, a level of responsibility to the other person. Mr. inexperienced is without a clue. Mr. inexperienced may have game to chase the wrong women and follows the "love em and leave em" approach in life. He may be sexually experienced, which is a huge turn on, but can he keep the relationship going? NO HE CAN"T. Even if there's a good sexual connection, he will leave. He has no clue as to what to do. He finds the next girl, tells her how twisted the last one was and takes it out on you. YOU, the complete opposite of the last one. He keeps himself guarded because of failure in the past. He's a huge mess. He doesn't know to handle women, you can't blame a fresh one for anothers actions. Each has to have their own clean slate. He'll stop calling, stop communicating, because he doesn't have another stratergy, another plan, another view. It's the easy way out for him. A real man will always call a woman, set up a brief meeting and break her heart, FACE TO FACE. The almost man, will do it over the phone. The inexperienced man just stops calling and leaves the machine on. He listens in your voice to that panic stricken voice, that "maybe i did something wrong, but ummmm i don't know what it is, can you help me, dear, figure it out" voice. He shifts the blame, "the end" onto you. Why??? Because this is easier. He has not developed his game. He has not "read" yet the correct and right way to end a romance or break up with a lover and still remain friends. Even the most beastly of lovers, the hard core "love em and leave em men", the ones i am sooo drawn to, yes even those, they know how to end with a lover and still remain on common ground. Know why?? Because you never know.....So my advice is no advice. He needs to mature, he needs to know how to end, he needs to be honest. He needs to say honey, I think we need a break, think we're not moving here....be honest...but lets remain in touch..no hard feelings....didn't set out to intentionally hurt you...i enjoyed the journey, you added something to my life....he does this because who knows? Maybe 2 months down the line, he realizes YOU WERE THE BEST THING SINCE SLICED BREAD. And within those 2 months, He LEARNS MORE ABOUT RELATIONSHIPS, ALTERS SOME OF HIS "NOT WORKING" VIEWS, and becomes a MAN. Your man to love. Life is about learning, and lets face it, no 1 person can have all of the "right answers or the right ways". We are too connected to each other on this planet for a reason. The answers lie in all of us. It's a journey god dammit! Enjoy the journey, stop questioning it, move with it, don't skip out on the small town over there, because there, right there is where your journey was pointing, you chose to ignore that small, old fashioned town because it wasn't so pleasing on the outside. And do you know what? You missed that small cafe where synchronized to your fate, there she was, sitting with her coffee, the one to show you, the one you will share and show with also, the many other secrets of life that have yet to be unfolded. This is where the story begins. You missed it, fool. Why? because you don't learn. don't throw people away so quickly, until you've gotten the lesson. Some lessons are longer than others. And timing is of essence, which is why, according to calcualtion, we rarely don't meet that person when we're 4 yrs old, maybe when we're in our 20's or 30's, know why? Because its your time. Oh and, don't take the short cut! (And by the way, according to the dictionary, not me, MAN is defined as one who has courage) Was sup with you men. Go out and get your courage, be that cave man, grab your woman by the hair and drag her back to your cave, because secretly, no matter how independent we think we are, WE LOVE THAT MAN, THAT BEAST, BEST. Love you men! Think: MAN MAN MAN Be the MAN
It's humanly impossible to take a coward and turn him into a man over night. A man can never ever change unless deep down in his soul, he wants to change. It doesn't matter how beautiful you are, how good natured you are, how much of a sweetheart you are. He can only change his distorted ways through re-examination of his thoughts, his mantra's, his ways of thinking about life. And lets face it, we all have opinions of how to be in relationships, certain codes that we live by, certain ideals, but do they really work? He has to re-examine the thought process. He has to come to terms with the FACT that his views/motto's about girls or relationships JUST DOES NOT WORK. How do i know this? Ask him how long his most serious and intimate relationship was. If you get a poop answer, then voila...he's without a clue. Let's just say he was with a woman for many many years. Then this a stable man. He knows how to love, how to be loved, how to interact with families, cousins, how to make plans that are outside of a bedroom and may include others as well, he knows how to communicate! After 7 or 8 years, this man makes it solid, there's a bond created that keeps the 2 of you coming back for more, a level of responsibility to the other person. Mr. inexperienced is without a clue. Mr. inexperienced may have game to chase the wrong women and follows the "love em and leave em" approach in life. He may be sexually experienced, which is a huge turn on, but can he keep the relationship going? NO HE CAN"T. Even if there's a good sexual connection, he will leave. He has no clue as to what to do. He finds the next girl, tells her how twisted the last one was and takes it out on you. YOU, the complete opposite of the last one. He keeps himself guarded because of failure in the past. He's a huge mess. He doesn't know to handle women, you can't blame a fresh one for anothers actions. Each has to have their own clean slate. He'll stop calling, stop communicating, because he doesn't have another stratergy, another plan, another view. It's the easy way out for him. A real man will always call a woman, set up a brief meeting and break her heart, FACE TO FACE. The almost man, will do it over the phone. The inexperienced man just stops calling and leaves the machine on. He listens in your voice to that panic stricken voice, that "maybe i did something wrong, but ummmm i don't know what it is, can you help me, dear, figure it out" voice. He shifts the blame, "the end" onto you. Why??? Because this is easier. He has not developed his game. He has not "read" yet the correct and right way to end a romance or break up with a lover and still remain friends. Even the most beastly of lovers, the hard core "love em and leave em men", the ones i am sooo drawn to, yes even those, they know how to end with a lover and still remain on common ground. Know why?? Because you never know.....So my advice is no advice. He needs to mature, he needs to know how to end, he needs to be honest. He needs to say honey, I think we need a break, think we're not moving here....be honest...but lets remain in touch..no hard feelings....didn't set out to intentionally hurt you...i enjoyed the journey, you added something to my life....he does this because who knows? Maybe 2 months down the line, he realizes YOU WERE THE BEST THING SINCE SLICED BREAD. And within those 2 months, He LEARNS MORE ABOUT RELATIONSHIPS, ALTERS SOME OF HIS "NOT WORKING" VIEWS, and becomes a MAN. Your man to love. Life is about learning, and lets face it, no 1 person can have all of the "right answers or the right ways". We are too connected to each other on this planet for a reason. The answers lie in all of us. It's a journey god dammit! Enjoy the journey, stop questioning it, move with it, don't skip out on the small town over there, because there, right there is where your journey was pointing, you chose to ignore that small, old fashioned town because it wasn't so pleasing on the outside. And do you know what? You missed that small cafe where synchronized to your fate, there she was, sitting with her coffee, the one to show you, the one you will share and show with also, the many other secrets of life that have yet to be unfolded. This is where the story begins. You missed it, fool. Why? because you don't learn. don't throw people away so quickly, until you've gotten the lesson. Some lessons are longer than others. And timing is of essence, which is why, according to calcualtion, we rarely don't meet that person when we're 4 yrs old, maybe when we're in our 20's or 30's, know why? Because its your time. Oh and, don't take the short cut! (And by the way, according to the dictionary, not me, MAN is defined as one who has courage) Was sup with you men. Go out and get your courage, be that cave man, grab your woman by the hair and drag her back to your cave, because secretly, no matter how independent we think we are, WE LOVE THAT MAN, THAT BEAST, BEST. Love you men! Think: MAN MAN MAN Be the MAN
posted by vita86lover at 8:32 PM
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